Job Hunting

November has been a month of waiting.....and waiting.....and waiting.....
 I'm in the process of applying for a few different positions. I've had an interview at the library which is a permanent part-time position. It would be something different. It is working with the Children's Program so that part would be familiar, but working in a library environment would be new, and a welcome change. My current job is so demanding, physically, and mentally that it is sucking the life blood out of me! So time to change it up.
Looks like I have another job offer but it is a part-time contract for 3 months in  social services and would be good experience for me. I never intended to work so much as I have the past 5 years and it's time to cut back and re-focus on my family and stop pushing myself so hard - which has become the norm . Such a slow process, I applied for the library job back in the beginning of September. And now that I should be hearing back this week, I just saw another posting for the same position at a closer branch with the exact amount of hours I would like to work. I applied and now the process starts again.

Haven't logged my runs lately either. My 3rd week of training for the 10K was mentally a struggle.   I did miss a couple of runs but finished the week off strong.
This week has been much better - running - such a mind game, for me anyway- but it is teaching me a lot about myself in many aspects.
Tonight I ran outside in the dark, and the rain. However, the weather was pretty mild 5C/41F so the rain felt refreshing, kind of felt like a kid again.  And hardly anyone was out-on foot- had the streets to myself pretty much.

Head Games or 'Snap out of it!'

Missed my training run on Monday and Tuesday for a plethora of reasons - so - started beating myself up about it - I'm way too perfectionistic! - It's like if I don't follow the training schedule perfectly, I feel like a loser, a failure, and what's worse, I don't feel like running because I feel defeated.
Nevertheless, today, I was feeling tired on the way home, like almost falling asleep while stuck in traffic tired, finally made it to my neighborhood after an hour commute, stopped for a few groceries, then home.
It's been cold and windy today  -12C/10F with the wind.
Now, in my profile, it does mention that I have a supportive husband. When I got home, feeling like just plopping down on the couch, I got my head in the right place, asked for help so that I could get my run in and still have time to unwind afterward. Well, he put away all the groceries and made supper - how's that for supportive.
Funny thing is, after that little break I had from running - I ventured out into the cold, dark night and had a great 35 minute run - at a faster pace than I've been running. All that worry and  self-flagellation for naught!
So what's the key to not letting the mind take over??  When I hit the road, my mind still was focusing on I'm tired, it's cold etc. but my body knew exactly what to do - Got to trust my body, even when my head is playing games with me.

A Little Gym

Survived a day and night of shopping in Syracuse - my legs were so achy that it was waking me up during the night! Woke up this morning, stumbled in the dark to gather up my clothes, including my favorite 'Dirty Oars' t-shirt, but that's another story- brought my key card down to the 1rst floor, which in Canada would be known as the second floor, and climbed aboard one of the two lonely treadmills, for an EZ 35 minutes.  The 'gym' included two treadmills, one elliptical machine, and one all-inclusive weight machine, a water cooler and two t.v's - but I did have it all to myself.
Listened to my music while flipping through the channels and stopped, flipping not running, when I came upon this:

Uh.., ya.., well , beats staring at a brick wall and the parking lot while on the treadmill.
After breakfast, went next door to the pharmacy and bought some Advil, for my legs, and then put in another full day of shopping. My mother sure can shop!

Morning

Hit the pavement by 5:30. Temp 0 Celsius - my favorite running temp.
Things I saw:
-black lab rolling on the lawn, totally oblivious to Shelby and I
- a runner
- a bunny
- a guy scraping his windshield
-another runner
-some dog walkers
-the sky change from black to blue
Put in 8k, no breaks - Yahoo!
Off to Syracuse for a weekend of shopping with my 71yr. old mother. Hope I can keep up with her - seriously - she's a shopping machine.

Lost And Found

Was in a near panic - couldn't find my ipod charger for two days and the little green bar was almost empty. Found it tonight, yay, I'll be able to run tomorrow without the thing dying.
Now to find my special silver and amber ring my dh bought me in Mexico last year....it's my favorite :(

Running in the Dark

Wow! It's getting dark so early now. By 5:00 I was out on the road and it was already dark.

Shelby and I ran 6.4k/3.5miles. I didn't feel like running today but I did. I'm still getting used to running without the walk breaks and to running 5x a week. So I could feel it in my legs, especially after doing those 400m intervals last night.  I was amazed that I could complete the distance without a break. There she is my loyal running partner with my son Sean.

Quality Time

5 400m intervals today on the treadmill. This is the start of week 2 of my 10K training. So far so good!
Last week I went to the track but this week I decided to use the treadmill for intervals and I liked it. It was nice that my son Sean was hanging out in the room  playing video games - hey it may not be 'quality' time but it was time together.

EZ 30

Yesterday, my easy 30, didn't feel so easy. Got home from my 4 mile run the night before around 10:30 then woke up Saturday and the first thing I did was go out for an EZ 30. Shelby came along of course. She is her most doggie self when she can be off-leash, running around and exploring. She is such a good running partner on leash as well. She keeps my rhythm going.  Maybe I should have waited until the evening to run that 30 mins. My legs were protesting the whole way, but I took it really easy and got it done. Definitely have ramped it up this week. The biggest changes being not taking walk breaks, and adding in two more days of running. That's a lot in a week, but I don't feel I overdid it. Glad today is a rest day though. Maybe I should be trying this thing:

Girl Run

Tonight I went out and ran with 3 other women. One of them I know and the other two were new to me.
Talking with runners is like talking with mothers. Instead of comparing birth stories in detail, you compare races, training plans, the good, the bad and the ugly of running. Just like a birth story, you know all the details, play by play and so it is for training and  running races.
Instead of running past cows, corn fields and pumpkin patches the scenery on our route looked more like this:

This is an actual building in north Kanata, also known as Research Park - lots and lots of high tech companies there. Ottawa is mostly government employees or high tech geeks.
So the run started off feeling kind of weird. I'm so used to putting on my music, having my dog Shelby with me and zoning out. But this was a very chatty group. At first I found it distracting, and then I noticed it was more effort to talk and run. But I got used to it after awhile and the chit chat made the time pass by quickly.
This is my third run this week with no 1 minute break after every 10 minutes of running. I'm doing it!
 So, although I was slow I was pleased that I finished the 6.6k, just over 4 miles without a walk break. Not too shabby for me. In one week I've gone from running 3x week with walk breaks, to 4 x a week without walk breaks + one day of 400m interval runs.The human body is an amazing thing. Shelby seemed a little insulted when I got home but  tomorrow it's a 30 min. easy run and she'll be coming along.

All Signed Up!

Officially registered - for the 10K

Last year we got those bright yellow jackets.

This year it's

 Not too bad
Ran 5k tonight without a break - I learned to run by building up to running 10 mins./walking 1 min. and just kept doing that, but the 10k training I'm doing is different. I managed to do the 5k, no problem, breathing was nice and steady, I did feel it in the legs, the last 100m. But then again, I'm used to having a rest day in between runs, and this plan only has 2 rest days out of 7. I'll see how it goes. So far so good. Definitely kicking it up a notch. Tomorrow, tempo run.

4X400

So started my 10K training today. First on the list - 4X400 - On paper that sounds pretty easy. Saying it out loud, sounds pretty easy - doing it - not as easy as I thought! But I did it and felt great when I was done.
It's my first time training like this and I think I'm going to like changing it up, with the tempo runs, long run, and what I did today, I can see how a person could barf doing that type of interval training. I like the idea too of some days running for distance and some days running for time.
Here's my Garmin screen capture:

Round, and round.... where the red lines jut out  shows me walking to pick up dog poop during my cool down walk at the end. I let Shelby off leash at that point and, well, dogs will be dogs. Then you can see where I had to walk past my car to find a garbage can. Love my Garmin!

OK - here I go

Today my friend Patti from church gave me the 10K training plan and I have to say, It's got me excited about running again. I think I was getting tired of doing the same thing day in day out, not changing it up enough.
We are going to try to run together on Fridays for our long runs with a couple of other gals.
Here is an actual archive photo of the local high school's track. The school's been around for a l-o-o-ng time.

So tomorrow I'll be running here doing 4x400 - sounds like a nice change.  I also like that the schedule changes up to be running some days for distance and some days for time. I think this will really help get me back on track.

Focus, Focus

This is what greeted me out my back door this morning

Yup, the white stuff is starting -It was all gone by the time I got home after work.
So this is my blog, about trying to overcome mental hurdles in my quest to run regularly.
I must say, this past week has been a struggle, i.e. have not run in at least a week. It seems to go like this. I get on a roll with running and am loving it and then something happens and I regress.
All of last week, I was feeling a lower energy than usual which manifested itself in a sore throat during the night, half-way through the week and the sniffles. Not enough to miss work but enough to feel dragged through the trenches by the time I got home from work.
The girls called me to go run with them Friday night but feeling under the weather, I declined as I had to work the next day (not usual for me to work on Saturdays, but I sometimes help out with and autism group consisting of 8 busy boys - no lunch break, we eat with the kids and no breaks - so I need all the energy I can get.)
Sunday, I stayed home to rest, didn't even go to church. It was nice to stay home and relax.
Today I felt more like myself and thought maybe I could do a run after work, but when I got home I just fizzled out.
The weather has changed very quickly from Indian Summer to c-c-c-old, an adjustment to make.
So, am I making excuses? or just listening to my body? in a funk? discouraged? too perfectionistic?(perfect or not at all mentality).
Whatever it is, it's good to come here and blog, helps to sort it out. It's good to remind myself that this is not a blog about chronicling perfect runs, perfect running habits, it's my journey to figure out what these hurdles are, how to change it, and grow from there. How not to overly pressure myself but yet to  set a goal. Balance!
I can say this, running does get you in touch with yourself, more body awareness, more mental contemplation during the run, and a better overall feeling of accomplishment, energy, and health and so many more benefits.